Negative Throwers

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Negative Throwers

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Danson Kinyua

Negative “energy vampires” are not living a life full of happiness and success, yet they will happily drag you down to their level unless you escape their clutches before it is too late!

Negativistic personalities tend to find the disappointing or gloomy side of just about anything. They sometimes appear to relish in the misfortune of others and seem to enjoy brooding and moaning about the less than perfect world they live in.

Most of these individuals have low self-esteem and attempt to increase their own sense of worth by either putting down others or seeking the unconditional validation of others. They are adept at soliciting attention, albeit negative attention, through their sarcasm and hard-to-please demeanor.

Do you know them?

I have come across some people who never have a good thing to say about anything or anybody. Nothing ever seems right for these people; the weather is either too hot or too cold, or they complain that others are never doing the right thing. Over time these people can really bring me down. Yet I may be forced to deal with them on a regular basis. They may be friends, work colleagues, or family members. What can I do to reduce the impact that interactions with these people can have on me?

Lord I know that words people speak can tear other people down. The sting of negative words performed by negative throwers. These are angry, bitter, gossiping, jealous, negative, and selfish people with intentions to steal others time and joy. I want to shake it off! I do not want to let their poison steal my time and happiness.

I know of a certain Waithiegeni who was known by all her neighbors as "Mama Mdomo." She was constantly whining about something to her neighbors, hence the name she was given. In fact, her mouth actually did turn down at the corners. It got to the point where people would cross the street just to avoid an encounter with her. Her family, long grown, seldom visited and it was easy to see why.

People like Waithiegeni love doom and gloom and are often the first to pass on tidbits of gossip as soon as they hear it. They possess great skills in finding the negative out of the most positive of incidences. One of these Waithiegeni type moaners can even manage to find a negative when her son is getting married to one of the best village girls. The son may be ecstatic, but within five minutes of informing his mother of his wonderful wedding and marriage, she may successfully manage to deflate him

Lord so many times i do wonder why these people behave this way? I am not Judging them, but they most typically possess characteristics such as:

Low self-esteem
Passive-aggressive tendencies
Attention seeking tendencies
Learned behaviors from others, such as their parents
Low level depression

The only problem I have Lord is that being constantly exposed to the negativity of these people can, over time, cause my own levels of optimism to plummet. That is why Lord I pray that you help me deal with other's persistent negativity depending on the type of relationship I have with the person concerned. Where the negative person is someone with whom I do not have many personal dealings, LORD help me to avoid them.

Often, however LORD, it may be a co-worker or family member that is constantly grinding me down. This makes the situation much more difficult to deal with as it is both chronic and more personal. Lord help me to:

Try not to buy into the negativity by changing the subject
Replace their negative statements with a positive one. Ultimately they MAY get sick of not being heard.
Praise their good attributes; they may then feel less of a need to be negative
Avoid being alone with them, but engineer my times together so that other people are around. This may help in "diluting" their impact.
Be assertive. Announce "Enough of the doom and gloom" and change the subject.