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Forgiveness
"When
you forgive, you set a prisoner free. And then you discover that the prisoner was you." Lewis Smedes
Generally, forgiveness is a decision to let go of resentment and
thoughts of revenge. The act that hurt or offended you may always remain a part of your life, but forgiveness can lessen its
grip on you and help you focus on other, positive parts of your life.
(Luke 23:34) Jesus said, "Father, forgive them,
for they do not know what they are doing."
Forgiveness
is "the act of setting someone free from a debt or obligation to you that is a result of a wrong done
against you." To expand that a bit: forgiveness is your act, a decision you make, to set a person free, to release them
from a debt, release them from something they owe you because they have said or done something that's hurt you, that's brought
pain into your life. Let's be very clear that in forgiving, you acknowledge that you've been hurt. But instead of retaliating
against or seeking revenge against the person who’s hurt you, you let them go, you forgive them. Actually, you can't really define forgiveness...in a way, it's a feelings that we have to
feel deep within our hearts. Real forgiveness is what releases us from a tenacious hold. It is actually a vital to living
in the freedom of the present moment. It is also the acceptance of ourselves, exactly the way we are, which is one of the
most important aspects for living a life of contentment. We're
not powerless in our quest for forgiveness. We can play an active role in attracting the grace of forgiveness. With our personal
will we can find the desire to forgive and fan the flames of this desire. It's as simple as deciding to forgive and then accepting
ourselves, exactly as we are, until we really feel it. Forgiveness is not something we do; it happens through grace.
Forgive
everyone who's trying to ruin your life.
Sources of Unforgiveness - Betrayal
- False accusation
- Rejection
- Abuse
- Humiliation
(Hebrews 2:17-18 Message) 'That's why he had to enter into every detail of human life. Then, when he came before
God as high priest to get rid of
the people's sins, he would have already experienced it all himself—all
the pain, all the testing—and would be able to help where help was needed." Forgiveness is not... - Minimizing the seriousness of the offense.
- Instant restoration of trust.
- Resuming the relationship without changes.
Be Forgiving - (1 Peter 2:23 LB) "When Jesus suffered, He did not threaten to get even; He left His
case in the hands of God..."
- We
need to forgive people because we need forgiveness. (Matthew
6:15) "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not
forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."
When Jesus says that the Father will not forgive, what He means is
that God will allow the person to walk in their sin (that is, He will not overlook it and embrace the person), to the necessary
extent; until they come face to face with it and see it for what it is. In other words, if the person is unwilling to forgive,
let him deal with a God twice as stubborn when it comes to forgiving. God will not give in and the sinning brother will have
to deal with an unforgiving Father, from whom he depends for the basic necessities of life (6:25-32). God's intention, as
the unforgiving brother goes his way in unforgiveness, is to expose him, to bring about legitimate shame and repulsiveness
toward the sin. It is a rare blend of justice and mercy. He did this for Jacob, for Israel and as Paul declares, for us also.
The result will often be Spirit-inspired, genuine repentance and love.
- We need to forgive people without condition. (Ephesians
4:32) "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Forgiving requires a courageous choice. The courageous choice is whether you are willing to consent to
this healing. In Greek, to forgive means “to let go.” Forgiveness is offered without conditions.
Using techniques such as forgiveness meditation/prayers or stopping to apply internal reflection, forgiveness can be centered
on someone alive or someone who has passed on. In letting go and forgiving, the process is not about wishing they would change.
- We need to
forgive people in advance. (Luke 11:4) "Forgive us our
sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us."
Today being a new day, we have a fresh start and can
make a decision to forgive what is past and even forgive what little irritations people may impose on us in the future.
Suppose a husband’s late again bringing back the kids home. But you have been practicing forgiveness on strangers, to
get you ready for the hardest forgiving attitude of all. You have made a decision to forgive your husband's inner unhealed
self and decide next time to overlook tardiness, especially since you've noticed that the kids cringe every time you get annoyed
with him for being late. You surprise yourself with this new behavior of deciding to forgive in advance your husband's stressed
out way of reacting to life.
- We need to forgive people
because they are victims too. (Ephesians 6:12) "For our
struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark
world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."
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